Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Monday Pumping Iron

Another Monday, another steely determination to hit the gym and work out my aching body. Yep, nothing is going to stop me this time. I have taken my preworkout energy mixture of amino acids and whatever else is in that thing I paid a lot of money for at GNC and I am on my way. I will not be stopped!

I could barely get into the parking lot at my gym because there were cars and people everywhere. They was some big truck out in front of the gym doors and as I pulled into the parking lot so very slowly in order to keep from running over people walking there I saw 2 cars parked on the concrete in front of the doors and people standing outside there apparently barbecuing.

"Oh hell, they must be having some sort of membership drive or something," I cursed to myself. "And from the looks of it, this is a membership drive for elderly Alzheimer's patients. Good God, everyone is ancient!"

Old people in Ford Crown Victoria's were everywhere, along with virtual mummies driving Toyota Camrys. And all parking badly.

I had to wade through a crowd just to get inside the gym. Once inside an elderly lady yelled at me, "sir, would you sign the guest register?"

"What? I'm not a guest. I'm a member." I replied somewhat impatiently. I think I made her mad.

I checked out the weight area and found very few of the old people there. "Good, at least I can still do my workout." But everywhere else in the gym there were swarms of people.

So I changed clothes and made my way to the weights. I did a back and bicep workout. And just like last week, I had no strength to speak of. My endurance was a little better, but the total lack of power makes me think I'm still battling something. I have no idea what to make of this, but it has hung on and hung on.

I tried my best to ignore the wretchedly old people who waddled past me, some with trainers assisting them, and many not paying any attention and just bumping into people who were in the middle of lifting weights.

After finishing my unproductive weight routine I went upstairs to run the treadmill. I had to make an athletic maneuver just to get past an old Chinese lady who was, I kid you not, walking right in the center of the stairs. She was moving very slowly with both elbows sticking out as she had both of her hands wrapped tightly around a cookie which she was eating without ever removing it from her mouth. I guess she was afraid someone might steal it from her. I don't know. But she reminded me of a squirrel the way she ate.

I made my way to the treadmill and completed a full half mile before that old lady made her way to the top of the stairs and over to the treadmills. Just like last week, despite my worthless strength workout, my running seemed to be totally unaffected. I ran fine. In fact, I ran even faster than I did last week. I finished a mile and went to stretch in the time it took the old squirrel woman to figure out how to turn on her treadmill and slowly creep along.

This wasn't a memorable workout. I did terrible. And oddly, my chest is still sore from the chest and tricep workout I did A FULL WEEK AGO. That is just not right. But whatever, at least I did another workout. Since December I think I've averaged a half workout per week maybe? Maybe less? I'm in sad shape. I really need to shake free of this whatever it is and get back to regular workouts every week. This once a week, or once every other week, or whatever I've done recently just isn't cutting it.

I'm posting this because it has been on my mind lately and I can't shake it. There was a movie on one night last week while was practicing guitar called "Abba: The Movie" and I halfway watched it. They've been stuck in the back of mind ever since. I remember when they were the biggest thing in rock music. The Beatles were gone. Zeppelin was gone. Elvis was dead. There was only them. And I was just a kid. I thought Agnetha, the blonde woman, was the hottest thing I had ever seen. Do you remember Abba?


  1. Was it pensioner coupon day at your Gym?

    "Do you remember ABBA?" Do I? They were my youf!
    I loved Benny. ;o)

  2. That cracked me up..I'm .Inspired by writings I hope you have around ....pretty clever...just saying

  3. Ute, I don't know if they were advertising special deals for retirees, or dredging the retirement homes for new members or what the story was, but for every young girl I saw there were 5 old people who clearly weren't going to be coming on a regular basis, which I guess is the gym owner's dream member.

    Everyone I knew was somewhat into Abba, but no one could remember any of their names except his.

    TellingItLikeItIs, thank you, I try to be as inspiring as I can without being a warning to others of what not to do. :-)

  4. I'm dreading the thought that one day I'll be the old bat in the gym holding everyone up!!!!

    @ Ute - my sis & her best mate & I used to "play" ABBA - they always made be be Benny!!! I feel much better about that knowing he was your fave!!!! :0)

  5. I've started going to this gym where I live [I actually run there as a warm-up, cannot stand those threadmills] - and I'm so lucky. There's not many working out the same hours I am. I go to a "all woman" gym, no guys allowed. Maybe that's why it's all empty... I dunno. It would be disturbing though if it was filled with old people, since it's a small gym...

    Hope you get all well in the end, that must suck big time not recovering properly from workouts. Weird.

    And as for the Abba part, I was too young when they were big - but I did watch "Mamma Mia!" when at my parents recently. The music is still awesome, and omg. Björn and Benny must have enough money for a dozen of lifetimes. At least.

  6. AlleyCat, I know one day I'll be the old guy slowly moving from machine to machine. But at least everyone will know me because I'll have been there for so long.

    You guys used to play ABBA and they made you be Benny? That's hilarious! I don't know why. I guess because you were all girls and someone had to be the guys. But it still makes me laugh. I think we tried to play ABBA, too, but I was lucky in that it was me and my best friend and his 2 younger sisters. And by coincidence, they all REALLY WERE Swedish, so they even had that blondish hair and everything.

    Confuzzled, my gym isn't quite near enough to run there as my warm-up, but it isn't usually that crowded. I expect once this membership drive is over it should go back to normal again after awhile.

    I hope I get well, too. I don't know what this is hanging on, but today I feel like I'm fighting the stomach flu. Hopefully I'm just extra tired and it'll pass.

    I have never seen "Mamma Mia" and I can't really figure out what its about. I guess I'll have to suck it up and watch it eventually. Yeah, Bjorn and Benny are each worth over $100 million. The girls are only worth $4 or $5 million at this point. Then again, the girls stayed in Sweden, where the taxes were killing ABBA, and I think the guys moved to LA or something.

  7. Ahem, I used to get mistaken for her back in the day (Agnetha, not the elderly Chinese squirrel lady - um, though come to think of it, these days there's more chance I'd pass for the latter..)

    Listen to your body, have a full body check out, even if you have to fund it yourself - seriously. worst that can happen is you get a clean bill of health.

  8. I may not be an ancient Chinese woman but I would definitely be the person eating a big cookie in a gym! I don't remember Abba because...well, I wasn't born yet. I do have a few of their albums now though because I do think they are fabulous!
    I hope you shake this thing soon. Maybe you got Mono or something. It tends to hold on for at least 6 months.

  9. Shrinky, people used to mistake you for Agnetha? Wow, I want to be your friend, pretty lady! :-) Can you sing like her, too? Wouldn't THAT be impressive? She and Frida could really belt out the tunes, and they never missed a note. Actually, I read that they both still produce the occasional solo album. I think the latest one was about 3 years ago, so apparently even as they get up there in years they haven't lost those amazing voices.

    I think I may have figured out what has been going on that I can't seem to generate any strength at the gym lately. I just need to test my theory and then I'll most likely blog about what I find.

    PaddedCellPrincess, I didn't object to the cookie. It was the WAY she was eating it that was freaky. And blocking the entire gym as she did so, as if that cookie was the only meal she had eaten in 30 years or something. I have Abba on vinyl. What does that tell you? HA HA! Actually it tells you nothing because it turns out they still make albums on vinyl, but they're harder to find than they used to be. Anyway, I was a kid when Abba was big. I remember everyone being in love with Agnetha, but we couldn't seem to remember her name for anything. No one could remember the names of the four members of the band because everyone except Benny had a strange name to us.